As I lay in bed unable to sleep, God just laid these thoughts on my heart, so I decided to share. I am baffled once again at just how quickly time flies. I spent a few minutes tonight looking at old videos of my little Jack when he was about 2 years old. He has grown so much over the past 2 years and matured into a little boy, he's no longer a toddler who struggles to articulate his thoughts. He's now quite the opposite. Talking non-stop and soaking up knowledge like a sponge.
I have realized once again just how precious these moments really are. As I tried to clean up tonight after dinner, Jack begged me to play a new game with him. Earlier today I had promised that after dinner and after he cleaned up all his things in the living room we could play his new game. He waited patiently all day and when the time came he put away all his things and obeyed all my requests. Somehow I still found myself buried in housework, baby crying, dishes piled to the ceiling-all while the oblivious farmer relaxing after a day of work on the farm watched TV - and all my little Jack wanted to do was play his game.
This is making me teary just reliving it-and it was only a few hours ago. It seems each time I struggle to regain order in my house I am reminded of this little poem:
Cleaning your house
while the children are growing
Is like shoveling the walk
while it is still snowing.
Now whoever penned those words was seriously a genius. I mean is that not the truth? And so these are the thoughts I have on my heart. Be intentional. I told Jack I would play that game with him, and had full intentions of stopping what I was doing and taking some time to play with him. I got caught up, as usual, when I should have just quit for the night and spent the time I had promised. Make the most of my time. Honestly, there will come a day when my floors won't be sticky, and the dishes will all be clean and put away and I'll get around to vacuuming daily. But when those days come, gone will be the board games and Disney Jr, and tickling little toes and singing songs, and wiping booger noses and morning snuggles, bedtime prayers and the rock-a-bye babies (which I still sing to the gonna-be-4-year-old). All those things will be only memories, in fact it will probably all be a blur. So for right now, in this moment, if my floors are sticky and my sink full of dishes - I will cherish the fact that my home is filled with laughter and my arms are full of hugs because these times are fleeting and they certainly won't last forever. Be patient. This one is easier said than done. There are moments in my day when I stop and give gratitude to God for the patience He's equipped me with. I blow myself away sometimes when I realize how patient I am! And then there's times when I need to stop and ask God (and my 4 year old) for grace because I reacted poorly and had little patience. We all make mistakes, but patience is one of those things that kids will remember. I want my kids to remember my patience. Be grateful for life's blessings. I am blessed to be able to spend time at home with my children. That is something I need to remind myself of everyday. This job is a blessing. And there's no one better for this job than me. That's why God hired me to take care of and love these babies. Because He knows best.
Now if I could just be reminded of these simple things everyday, and not while I am laying in bed recounting my day. It's times like now when I am trying to figure out what I did well and what I could have done better that I am grateful for, but wished would come at more opportune times. I did, by the way, play Jack's new game with him and it was fun and I know it meant the world to him. And the sink is still full of dishes. I will get to those tomorrow...
Good night from the farm,
-The Farmer's [tired] Wife