Clean Eating...a No Brainer for the "Farmers Wife", right? Wrong.

So as a self-proclaimed "farmers wife" I have been contemplating the idea of "clean eating" for quite some time now. I'd say about 6-8 months. You'd think living on a farm would make this whole idea of organic and natural foods a no-brainer, right? Wrong. I am a fast-food junkie, potato-chip-eating, ranch-sauce-dipping, soda-drinking, healthy-lifestyle failure. And as much as I really want to overhaul my diet and change my eating habits--I am having the hardest time taking the plunge and committing.

I am a serial crash-dieter with a bathroom cabinet full of those belly-fat-loss green tea pills, slim quick, and every other get-skinny quick diet pill. I've done extreme cleanses - only drninking water, lemon juice, cayenne pepper and pure maple syrup for 10 days - all while running off more calories than I was taking in. You name it, I've done it.

For a while it worked actually. I was feeling pretty good about my body in August and September of 2012...only to find that our little princess was cooking beneath my almost-flat-stomach. Ugh...back to square one.

And here I sit, having just finished my dinner of sauteed chicken breast and green beans...good, right? Wrong, because I washed it down with a diet Pepsi - possibly the most toxic beverage I could have possibly chosen - and polished off the pot of Kraft Mac n Cheese that I made for my son for dinner. Hashtag epicfail.

Seriously, everytime I find myself in the Taco Bell drive-thru I say OK this is it! And I vow to stop eating fast food...until reality slaps me and says "who are you kidding?" And while I'd like to say I've had my last Beef Chalupa Supreme and finished my last pot of Mac n Cheese - I honestly just don't think I have it in me. Not to mention how much I love to enjoy a Miller High Life or 4 from time to time.

Another thing: I have a billion questions about this eating clean thing. Like tonight, for instance. I am sauteeing my beans - which I always do with garlic and olive oil - I have the giant tub of minced garlic from the grocery store. Does eating clean mean I have to ditch the tub of super-convenient-already-minced-just-throw-it-in-the-pan garlic and mince my own garlic - because that's just NOT happening.
Can I still use butter? Because I LOVE me some butter. Don't get me wrong,  EVOO is delicious in it's own right but you just can't beat the creamy-deliciousness of REAL butter.
Can I still season things with regular salt and pepper? How does salt come into play here?? I'm just so confused as to what is acceptable and what is not when it comes to seasonings. I know there's organic spices and stuff - do I go that route? Oh and Lawry's Seasoned Salt - I don't think I could part with it...is that "clean"?

And really, how "clean" do I have to be for it to be effective? I want more energy, I want to feel better, I want to be healthier and I want NEED to lose some weight. But I don't want to do it half-heartedly only to fail again.

I have read blogs and was scouring Pinterest tonight looking for some information and I swear all the blogs on "clean eating for beginnners" are just too vague for me. Where do I shop? Because that's another little issue we have here on the farm  -- budget cuts. We're on a serious spending hiatus and our grocery budget has gone from small to miniscule. Which is fine, I have accepted the farmer's challenge with grace and agree that we could stand to shave a little extra off our spending. I'm not going to use the "eating healthy is just too expensive" excuse because I hate lame excuses and I don't buy that excuse for a second.

Does Trader Joes count as a good place to buy these "clean" foods? Because if that's the case then I'm in! I ♥ Trader Joes. Trader Joes I can do. It's the Heath Huts & Whole Foods that scare me. Not so sure about those. And meal planning. Because the problem with eating foods that are fresh and not processed is they go bad a lot quicker! No such thing as stock piling fresh fruits and veggies - so meal planning and shopping 1 week at a time.

Accountablility is my last little obstacle. I mean the farmer would be great at that...all while eating his cheesy-creamy-preservative-filled plate of chicken alfredo and garlic bread. Because hell would literally have to freeze over before he joined me in my "clean eating" adventure. So I would seriously need to find a buddy or something. Someone to keep me in check. And I don't have time/money for like a personal trainer/dietician either. I live in the real world - where kids cost a bajillion dollars and mortgage bills come every month, cars break down and kids break their legs and go to the ER, then the hospital, then back to the ER for an ear infection. In other words pre-paid meal plans and personal trainers are out of the question for this girl.

So I guess with all that being said, I'm ready to make the change and I want to, but it's one of those "easier said than done" type things. So here's to really committing and kicking my habits of poor meal choices and half-hearted work outs and "crash diets" and "jumping on the bandwagon" and all that. I am going to work on a meal plan, grocery shop tomorrow and even go through my cabinets and nix everything that is really unhealthy and shouldn't be there. (AAAHHHHH!!!) Seriously though, I am going to do it.

Ready. Set. Go!

-The Farmer's [dead serious about this] Wife